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Raising Children is Racket Science

Raising Noise-Free Kids

We live in a country that is very blessed. Everyone is an expert on child rearing. Do not feed her this, do not talk like that, do not make her wear this, look who she is talking to, why is she rolling in the mud … regular advice that come by every parent for free.

I do not grudge most people of baantofying gyaan... infact, I indulge in it myself (only sometimes though, and most times my amazingly receptive friends look through me).

What these Gyaani babas did not say was I should also book an appointment with an ENT specialist as soon as possible. I mean, one cannot believe the decibel level in my house these days. From the blaring, nerve grating Chindian (Chinese Indian) music that seems to be part of every toy in the market to the howling temper tantrums, my poor ear drums are ready to pack up and desert.

So, I want a couple of things banned before I go stone deaf:

Horrible musical toys

Shrieking cartoon characters

Nonsense movie songs

Horrible musical toys (I have a big pile of those at home, hence deserves to be mentioned twice)

People who honk (nothing to do with kids, but I was in a flow and so...)

Temper Tantrums

Ok. Got to go, I have to go hide the batteries I extracted from ita’s guitar before she realizes they are missing

By Uma Iyer