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One day, Pete complained to his friend,"My elbow really hurts. I guess
I should see a doctor."

His friend said, "Don't do that. There's a computer at the drug store
that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply
put in a sample of your urine, and the computer will diagnose your
problem and tell you what you can do about it It only costs $10.00."

Pete figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine
sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in
the sample and deposited the $10.00. The computer started making some
noise and various lights started flashing.

After a brief pause, out popped a small slip of paper, which read: You
have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water, avoid heavy labor. It
will be better in two weeks.

That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was and

it would change medical science forever, he began to! wonder if this
could be fooled. He decided to give it a try.

He mixed together some tap water,a stool sample from his dog,and urine
samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into
the concoction.

He went back to the drug store, located the computer, poured in the

sample and deposited the $10.00. The machine again made the usual

noises, flashed lights,and printed out the following analysis:

1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.

2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.

3. Your daughter is gettin' screwed by three guys at the same time

and having urinary infection. Put her on antibiotic and keep a
track of her outings.

4. Your wife is pregnant . . twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a

5. And bastard,....... if you don't stop jerking off, your elbow will
never get better !!!!!!!