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Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.

Candidate: I am Rameshwar Kulkarni. I did my Telecommunication engineering from BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology.

Int: BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology? I had never heard of
this college before!

Candi: Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission into
it. What happened is - due to cricket worldcup I scored badly in 12th.I was
getting a paid seat in a good college. But my father said (I prefer to call him
'baap') - "I can not invest so much of money". The baap actually said - "I will never waste so much of money on you"). So I had to join this college. Frankly speaking this name - BabanRao Dhole-Patil, can at the most be
related to a Shetaki Mahavidyalaya hehehe...

Int: ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your engineering.

Cand: Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you know, these cricket matches and football worldcup, and tennis tournaments.. It is difficult to concentrate.. So I flunked in 2nd and 3rd year. So in all I took 4 + 2 = 7 years.

Int: But 4+2 is 6.

Cand: Oh, is it? You know I always had KT in ! maths. But I will try to
keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks. These cricket matches really
affect exams a lot. I think they should ban it.

Int: Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.

Can: No, no.. I am talking about Exams!!

Int: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life?

Can: Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought I would
complete it. In fact, when i flunked in 3rd year, she was looking for a job
for me in BEST through some relative.

Int: Do you have any plans of higher study?

Can: he he he.. Are you kidding? Completing 'lower' education itself was
so much of pain! !!

Int: Let's talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have you

Can: Well, I work at SEEPZ, so you can say Andheri is my current platform.
Earlier I was at Vashi center. So Vashi was my platform then. As You can
see I have experience of different platforms!

Int: And which languages have you used?

Can: Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German,
French, Russian and many other languages he he he...

Int: Why VC is better than VB?

Can: It is a commom sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher
version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new
language VD!

Int: Do you know anything about Assembly Language?

Can: Well, I have not heard of it. But I guess, this is the language our ministers and MPs use in assembly.

Int: What is your general project experience?

Can: My general experience about projects is - most of the times they
are in pipeline!

Int: Can you tell me about your current job?

Can: Sure, Currently I am working for Bata Infotech ltd. Since
joining BIL, I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that
Bench was another software like Windows he he he..

Int: Do you have any project management experience?

Can: No, but I guess it shouldn't be difficult. I know Word and
Excel.I can talk a lot. I know how to dial for International phone
call and use speaker facility. And very important - I know few words like -
'Showstoppers' , 'hotfixes', 'SEICMM', 'quality', 'version control', 'deadlines' ,
'Customer Satisfaction' etc. Also I can blame others for my mistakes!

Int: What are your expectations from our company?

Can: Not much.
1. I should at least get 40,000 in hand.
2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have
deadlines. I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent.
3. I believe in flexi-timings.
4. Dress code is against basic freedom, so I would like to wear t-shirt
and jeans.
5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest wed off also, so as to
avoid breakdown due to overwork.
6. I would like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term (preferably 1-2
months) assignments. Personally I prefer US, Australia and Europe. But
considering the fact that there is a worldcup in West Indies in 2007, I don't mind going there in that period.
As you can see I am modest and don't have many expectations. So can I
assume my selection?

Int: he he he ha ha ha. Thanks for! your interest in our organization. In
fact I was never entertained so much before. I request you not to apply in
our organization for next 100 years. After that we might consider

The candidate still doesn't know why he was not selected.