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Subject: Declaring War on America - Punjab Style

George Bush was sitting in his office wondering whom to invade
next when his telephone rang.

"Hallo, Mr. Bush!" a heavily accented voice said, "This is
Banta from Phagwara, District Kapurthala,Punjab. I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring the war on you!"

"Well, Banta," Bush replied, "This is indeed important news!
How big is your army"

"Right now," said Banta, after a moment's calculation, "there
is myself, my kajin Santa, my next door neighbour Tirlochan, and the entire kabaddi team from the gurudwara. That makes eight"

Bush paused. "I must tell you, Banta that I have one million
men in my army waiting to move on my command."

"Arrey O! Main kya.. " said Banta. "I'll have to ring you

Sure enough, the next day, Banta called again.

"Mr. Bush, it is Banta, I'm calling from Phagwara STD, the war
is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"

"And what equipment would that be, Banta" Bush asked.

"Well, we have two combines, a donkey and Amrik's tractor."

Bush sighed. "I must tell you, Banta, that I have 16,000 tanks
and 14,000 armoured personnel carriers. Also, I've increased my army to 1-1/2 million since we last spoke."

"Oh teri ...." said Banta. "I'll have to get back to you."

Sure enough, Banta rang again the next day.

"Mr. Bush, the war is still on! We have managed to get ourselves
airborne...... We've modified Amrik's tractor by adding a couple of
shotguns, sticking on some wings and the pind's generator. Four school pass boys from Patiala have joined us as well!"

Bush was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. "I
must tell you, Banta, that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided,
surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"

"Tera pala hove...." said Banta, "I'll have to ring you back."

Sure enough, Banta called again the next day.

"Kiddan, Mr. Bush! I am sorry to tell you that we have had to
call off the war."

"I'm sorry to hear that," said Bush. "Why the sudden change of

scroll down....

"Well," said Banta, "we've all had a long chat over a couple
of lassi's, and decided there's no way we can feed two million
prisoners of war!"

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