Lawyers are the true most people on Earth. Ha ha ha. Sorry, we are not allowed to lie publically. But these jokes are truly hilarious.
Scene: A courtroom where a witness is testifying in a case involving a man biting of the ear of another man during a fight. After supplying testimony which was very bad for the defendant, the witness was being cross examined by the defendants attorney.

Attorney: You said that you saw the defendant and plaintiff in a fight?

Witness: Yes

Attorney: You then said that you were concerned for your safety and that, because of this concern, you sought shelter elsewhere?

Witness: Yes

Attorney: You further stated that during this time of seeking shelter, you turned your back to the fight at hand?

Witness: Yes

Attorney: And THEN you testified that that was when the defendant bit off the plaintiff's ear??!!

Witness: Yes

Attorney:Well then, did you SEE the defendant bite off the plaintiff's ear?

Witness: No

Attorney: (Smugly) THEN HOW DO YOU "KNOW" THAT THE DEFENDANT BIT OFF THE EAR OF THE PLAINTIFF IF YOU DID NOT SEE HIM DO IT??!!

Witness:I saw him spit it out

(Dead Silence)

Attorney: No more questions
ADVERTISEMENT