Searching for a laugh? Your sense of humor is about to explode with comedy inside. Prepare to witness the Best Laughs from Jokes ever.

Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?
Student: I don't know.
Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?
Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.

On a crowded bus, one man noticed that another man had his eyes closed.
"What's the matter? Are you sick?" he asked.
"No, I'm okay. It's just that I hate to see old ladies standing."

If big elephants have big trunks, do small elephants have suitcases?

A: Do you want to hear a dirty joke?
B: Ok
A: A white horse fell in the mud.

A nervous old lady on a bus was made even more nervous by the fact that the driver periodically took his arm out of the window. When she couldn't stand it any longer, she tapped him on the shoulder and whispered on his ear: "Young keep both hands on the wheel...I'll tell you when it's raining!" :)

I used to be a werewoolf...
But I'm much better noooooooooooow !

"Spell SPOT three times."
"S P O T , S P O T , S P O T"
"What do you do when you come to a green light?"
(answer is invariably-) "Stop!"
"What, at a GREEN light?"

There is a California dude going through a desert. He's wearing shorts, sunglasses, a towel and listening to music on his walkman. He's having a good time. Suddenly he sees a caravan approaching. He stops the Arabs and ask them cheerfully: "Hey dudes how far is the sea?" They look at each other and say: "Two thousand miles!" And he says: "Wow what a cool beach!!!"

In a restaurant:
Customer: Waiter, waiter! There is a frog in my soup!!!
Waiter: Sorry, sir. The fly is on vacation.

One teacher said this to his students before the final test.
"A" is for God.
"B" is for me and my wife.
"C" is for the perfect student.
"D & F" are for all other students.

Man said to God --- Why did you make women so beautiful?
God said to man --- So that you will love them.
Man said to God --- But why did you make them so dumb?
God said to man --- So that they will love you.

This is a humorous "fake" news items which many adult ESL/EFL students may understand.
REDMOND, WA (API) --- MICROSOFT (MSFT) announced today that
the official release date for the new operating system
"Windows 2000" will be delayed until the second quarter of

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Olive who?
Olive you so much! (I love you so much..)

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

(For advanced learners... and teachers?)
Early one morning, one of the gods was galloping around Mount Olympus. Invigorated by the brisk breeze, he shouted euphorically, "I'm Thor!"
His stallion looked back at him and reminded him, "That'th becauthe you forgot the thaddle, thilly!"

Did you hear about the skeleton who walked into a cafe?
He ordered a cup of coffee and a mop.

1. Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw?
2. Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard?

You can use this joke to explain that insulting someone is considered funny especially when that person is fishing for a compliment.
Mary: John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly. What do you think, Peter?
Peter: I think you're pretty ugly.

My boss is so unpopular even his own shadow refuses to follow him.

"Do you know what really amazes me about you?"
"Oops.Sorry. I was thinking about someone else!"

Why do we park our car in the driveway and drive our car on the parkway?

If tin whistles are made of tin, what are fog horns made of?

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

A person who speaks two languages is bilingual...A person who speaks three languages is trilingual...A person who speaks four or more languages is multilingual.
What is a person who speaks one language?
An American.

A man receives a phone call from his doctor.
The doctor says, "I have some good news and some bad news."
The man says, "OK, give me the good news first."
The doctor says, "The good news is, you have 24 hours to live."
The man replies, "Oh no! If that's the good news, then what's the bad news?"
The doctor says, "The bad news is, I forgot to call you yesterday."

Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an "I".
Student: I is the....
Teacher: Stop! Never put 'is' after an "I". Always put 'am' after an "I".
Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.

Two factory workers are talking. The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day off."
The man replies, "And how would you do that?"
The woman says, "Just wait and see." She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling.
The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?"
The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb."
The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off."
The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?"
The man says, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark."

Two cows are standing in a field.
One says to the other "Are you worried about Mad Cow Disease?"
The other one says "No, It doesn't worry me, I'm a horse!"

Man: How can you tell if a man is happy?
Woman : Who cares?!